06/17/2025
Have you ever found yourself in a conversation where your friend highlights a recent accomplishment, and you respond by describing one of your own accomplishments that is perhaps slightly better…though embellished?
I wish I could say that I have matured to a level of humility that doesn’t require my self-esteem to be centered on how others view me or my successes or failures. Not all of life is a competition. When a preacher friend tells me, “Our church grew 30% last year,” too often I find myself thinking…or even saying, “Well, we grew last year in a lot of ways that aren’t quite as easily measured. But we’re growing too!” Why do I feel the need to “one-up” what others celebrate and not simply join in their celebration with humility and grace?
It's hard to be humble.
However, humility is a common trait in the Christian life. Our Founder showed us the way when “he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death, even death on a cross” (Philippians 2:8). The Apostle Paul instructed us not to think too highly of ourselves (Romans 12:3). Three times in his first letter, the Apostle Peter taught us the way of humility: “Have…a humble mind… God gives grace to the humble…. Humble yourselves” (1 Peter 3:8; 5:5, 6).
I’m convinced that humility is the counterbalance to insecurity. Yes, there are those narcissists who think too highly of themselves, and they have no problem expounding on the fortunes of their braggadocious claims. But I don’t think that describes most of us. I believe most of us struggle with just the opposite. We are not overly and unhealthily secure; we are overly and unhealthily insecure, and we use boasting as a deflection for our insecurity.
I’ve heard it said before that humility is not thinking too highly or too lowly of ourselves. It’s simply not thinking about ourselves. That, too, can be overstated, but the point is still relevant. The Jesus way is putting others before yourself. It’s celebrating the accomplishments of others without thinking about your own accomplishments or the lack thereof.
If someone says, “Wow, she’s pretty,” don’t ask yourself, “Does that mean I’m not pretty?” If a friend tells you, “Man, that guy is smart,” don’t assume he’s implying that you are not. Take the focus off yourself and give thanks for who you are in Christ Jesus. Earlier in Philippians 2, Paul writes, “Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves” (Philippians 2:3).
The call of Scripture is to celebrate our weakness, for God’s power is made perfect in our weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9). Perhaps those in support or recovery groups can show us the way: when we are desperate and needy, and surrender our weakness to Jesus Christ, it becomes a place of great power.
Some churches host recovery groups in their basement, and those going through the program will sometimes say, “Upstairs people seem to have their lives together, while downstairs people are trying not to fall apart. When you come to church, you can go upstairs and hear about miracles or go downstairs and see them.”
Let’s go downstairs. Let’s learn to be humble.
