07/08/2025
Have you ever caught yourself saying something like:
“I would have done that, but...”
“I could have accomplished such-and-such, but…”
“I should have spent more time with my kids, but…”
Regret has a way of sneaking up on us. And no one knew that better than Bronnie Ware, a palliative care nurse who spent years caring for people in the final weeks of their lives. In her powerful article, Regrets of the Dying, she shared the five most common regrets of her patients:
- 1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me. Many people never honored even half of their dreams, and realized too late that it was due to choices they made or didn’t make.
- 2. I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.
- 3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings. So many suppressed their true feelings to get along with people.
- 4. I wish I had made the effort to stay in touch with friends.
- 5. I wish I’d let myself be happier. Many only realized at the end that happiness is a choice, and that they’d stayed stuck in old patterns.
These insights are sobering—but they’re also an invitation—an invitation to examine how we’re living right now.
There’s a myth circulating that the key to improving your life is to focus all your energy on solving your problems. Yes, it’s wise to work on your challenges—but the real transformation comes not just from fighting what’s wrong, but from pouring more energy into what’s right.
The Apostle Paul put it this way:
“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.” (Philippians 4:8)
“Take every thought captive to obey Christ.” (2 Corinthians 10:5)
When we allow the demands of the present to overshadow our hopes for the future, we end up focusing on what isn’t, rather than what could be. Yes, we have responsibilities right now. But we also have the power to create moments that shape a better tomorrow.
Chip and Dan Heath, in The Power of Moments, said this: “In life, we can work so hard to get the kinks out that we forget to put the peaks in.”
So, here’s a challenge: Don’t just fix problems—create peaks. Stretch yourself. Be creative. Practice courage. Stay connected to Jesus and to others. Intentionally craft moments of elevation that help you break out of old patterns and write a new story.
Because if you practice these things, maybe you’ll discover how to live a life of fewer regrets…and more joy.
Speaking of living with no regrets…aging doesn’t mean fading into the background. In fact, your later years can be your greatest years! If you’re curious how to turn getting older into a time of purpose and joy, I invite you to join us for the Not Too Old Conference on August 16. It’s open to people of all ages who want to gain a deeper understanding of aging and believe it’s never too late to create moments that matter. For more information and to register, click here.
Let’s make sure we’re not just avoiding regrets…but building the kind of life we’d be proud to look back on.
