I’ve been thinking a lot about marriage and family recently, most likely because my daughter is getting married this coming Friday, my youngest son and daughter-in-law are expecting their first child this coming May, and my oldest son and daughter-in-law are phenomenal parents to our two grandkids in Cambodia.
In addition, we’ve welcomed a lot of new babies into the nursery at the church I serve. It’s great to see so many active young couples at E91!
What I’ve been witnessing in my own family and at church lately, however, seems to run counter to broader cultural trends. Marriage, for example, has become less common. According to the U.S. Census Bureau, nearly a third of households in the United States consisted of one person in 2020, compared with fewer than one in ten in 1940.
A study by the National Center for Family and Marriage Research found that the marriage rate has dropped by nearly 60 percent since the 1970s. A 2023 Pew Research Center report found that parents place greater importance on their children’s careers and financial futures than on their getting married or having children. Eighty-five percent of respondents said it was extremely or very important that their children become financially independent, and a similar percentage said the same about their children having jobs they enjoy. Only around 20 percent placed that level of importance on their children getting married or having children of their own (Go Home for Dinner, Mike Pence, 230).
Here’s the irony: Our culture can be pretty dismissive of the “traditional” family, yet studies indicate that social isolation and loneliness have reached epidemic levels. In 1790, the Irish philosopher Edmund Burke wrote, “To love the little platoon we belong to in society, is the first principle of public affections” (Reflections on the Revolution in France).
Strong families help nurture the love, responsibility, and commitment that healthy communities need. When those bonds weaken, the effects reach far beyond our homes. A strong family isn’t just a nice idea; it is part of the bedrock of healthy communities, societies, and nations.
What can we do to help create healthy families? Whether married or single, young or old, we can all invest in the “little platoons” around us. We can rock babies in the nursery. We can mentor our youth. We can invest in Christ-centered marriages. We can learn and practice biblical principles for being godly husbands and wives, moms and dads, uncles and aunts—even when our role in someone’s life is more spiritual than familial.
And we can take to heart what President Ronald Reagan said in his farewell address to the nation on January 11, 1989: “All great change begins at the dinner table. So, tomorrow night in the kitchen, I hope the talking begins.”
By God’s grace and power, we can help our families thrive. Let’s do this. Let the talking begin.
